Foot Club
Feet Run in this Family
But they’re more likely to walk. Up and down too, rather than side to side. Hopping has never been massively popular with Robinsons, but sliding about on skates, skis and the like has, while hoofing spherical objects around is considered great fun. Family feet sometimes simply rest, but they never smell. That’s a job for noses.
Foot Feats Well, yes! OK, it is possible to hoof a spherical object with both feet simultaneously, but not many spherical object hoofers are likely to. It's a foot feat, but....
Feet Feats Cover just about everything else. There are bits here about sliding, more about running and even more about walking, which has been a major Robinson passion for decades.
Diane BR, (Before Robinson), doesn't have records of early perambulations.
Gene does and can identify four distinct Steps in Walking History Robinson:
1
Correct
Gene
See
below
Hill Walking
Folk who go walking about on the surface of Mars do so at their own risk.
The same applies to the surface of the Earth, the difference being that their planet comes with built-in health warnings, for which they should be grateful to the appropriate department of the Universe.
Things That Aren’t Arbitrary
Magnitudes of natural forces and properties of fundamental particles for a start!
That means mass, density and atmospheric pressure of any potentially habitable planet, its non-arbitrary gravitational field strength determining directly dimensions and proportions of both inhabitants and mountains.
So, never let anyone tell you that Munro’s Tables is just an arbitrary list!
God, or no God, fluke it is not that Milky Way has a planet with an ancient land of eroded peaks, peopled by hairy-arsed creatures in size 11 clogs. It’s no accident that their rows of “little piggies” have led to a ten-based counting system, so stature lists of hills founded on small integral numbers of thousands of clog lengths were prescribed at Time Zero.
Long live Munro’s Tables! And what’s good for Munro is good for others too... but isn’t Milky Way a lovely name? How fortunate that there isn’t a huge brown streak in the night sky!
Footnote 1. Size 11 is correct, not 12, which is the measurement in inches.
Footnote 2. Hill walking involves feet, not metres.
Footnote 3. At Time Zero the Universe begins and Gene knows how. Universe begins with a capital letter.
Well, it does when Gene writes it, anyway. And, on the basis of what’s good for Mars and Venus, so do Earth, Moon and Sun.
Incorrect
2
Martin
See
below
Walking Hills
You can’t walk hills if there aren’t any; and if you don’t know where they are, then there aren’t any! Gene’s dad was forever asking that, “How do you know where they are?”
Folk who are born, or taken to live, three feet from Ben Nevis aren’t necessarily going to be aware of its attraction, significance, or presence even, so what’s the answer?
Inspiration. Once inspired you seek them out. And it’s a roundabout. What you find when you seek inspires. A name, a shape, the fold of a contour, they make their mark. And someone else’s take on the same thing. Summits defined; Peak-Bagger. Maligned, but the “where” where it matters.....
The photograph shows a typical example, but it must be pointed out that, in most upland areas, such notices are likely to be thin on the ground (Earth). Those who go planet surface walking on Earth must recognise that absence of warning notice does not mean that they do so at someone else’s risk.
Foot Feats
Photograph (top of page) dates circa 1953.
coming 40 years later illustrates how irresponsible one's children can be. The lamentable state depicted results solely from the hoofing of non-spherical objects.
Gene, Maybury Road (Hull)
Junior School Football Team.
Martin, Aspatria (Cumbria) RUFC
Junior Team.
Just look!
Can't even pull his socks up!
Tut Tut!
Foot Feats
was taken by Gene's dad on Flinton Grove School Playing Field using a primitive box camera, so it's an amazing photo considering Gene's L to R speed of about 25mph (honest!)
and taken at Bower Park by Philip, show no movement whatsoever, L to R or otherwise.
Concealed by the monochrome and/or mud is a link beyond the genetic between and .
Aspatria and Maybury both.....Black and Red....
Aspatria's squared version as modelled by M is mudless, though RU, because the venue is near Carlisle United's (spherical) Brunton Park.
4
3
Foot Feats
Maybury Road Juniors won a cup, which was presented at the school by the legendary Raich Carter! But it was a Maybury Road Juniors a bit before Gene's day. Martin, though, did play on a cup winning side for Junior Aspatria. And what a club!
But Gene did have his day; three times too: Under 12½, Under 13½ and Under 14½, post junior school, at Malet Lambert High. In tasteful green and just plain yellow they played against all other grammar schools in the Hull area, grammar schools, the teams of which always appeared huge, or huger! So, how amazing to strut off the field after Match 1 of Year 1 believing in their skill!
None of this "settle-for-a-draw" nonsense in schoolboy soccer! Never mind sneaking a win by the odd goal. It was score as many as possible! Look at the records Gene irresponsibly didn't keep and you'll see how Malet hammered all opposition! Well, OK, Riley were just about a match! Even then they never drew! They just won in equal share! That's how it should be! And to prove it, here's the record Gene did keep, the third year, after he'd learned to write! (Brian O'Kane must have thought Gene a pain-in-the-arse, as he "interviewed" him on leaving the field after each match, as to who scored what and when, but it survives.) Sorry for the hassle, Brian, but, if it's any consolation, you were the greatest centre forward Gene ever passed a ball to! He once saw you score for Hopewell Road School, before meeting you, and was awe-struck!
1
1
2
2
3
1
2
1
2
4
Riley High School
(New Colours)
Withernsea
Gene's original crayon-generated alongside computer-generated. Is this progress? Well, the originals do show questionable use of apostrophe in the heading, one "E" too few in "Beverley", and, unforgivingly, a missing "M" in "Lambert"! But the computer hasn't a clue about human arm thickness!
Kingston
High School
Hull Grammar School
Beverley Grammar School
HULL
GRAMMAR
SCHOOLS'
C
T O
E L
A O
M U
R
S
Withernsea matches were "friendlies", because they were part of the East Riding set-up, where huger- than-normal players were allowed!
So beating Withernsea was very sweet!
Malet Lambert High School
Marist College
Riley High School
| 21-9-57 | Home | Marist | Cancelled by Marist | ||
| 28-9-57 | Away | Kingston | 4-2 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Marsden 2, O'kane 1, Sykes 1 |
| 5-10-57 | Away | Riley | 0-2 | No Scorer for Malet Lambert | |
| 12-10-57 | Home | Beverley | 6-1 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | McGowan 1, O'Kane 3, Robinson 1, Sykes 1 |
| 19-10-57 | Home | Hull Grammar | 8-0 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 4, Kent 2, O'kane 1, Sykes 1 |
| 26-10-57 | Away | Withernsea | 4-2 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Kent 1, Marsden 1, O'kane 2 |
| 9-11-57 | Away | Marist | 8-3 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 4, Marsden 2, Sykes 2 |
| 16-11-57 | Home | Kingston | 11-1 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 2, Marsden 1, McGowan 2, O'Kane 2, Robinson 1, Sykes 3 |
| 23-11-57 | Home | Riley | 4-2 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Hutchinson 1, Marsden 1, O'Kane 1, Robinson 1 |
| 7-12-57 | Away | Beverley | 4-1 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 1, O'Kane 1, Robinson 1, Sykes 1 |
| 14-12-57 | Away | Hull Grammar | Cancelled by Grammar | ||
| 11-1-58 | Away | Riley | Cancelled by both | ||
| 18-1-58 | Home | Marist | 6-1 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Kent 1, McGowan 1, O'Kane 1, Robinson 1, Sykes 2 |
| 25-1-58 | Away | Kingston | Cancelled bad ground | ||
| 1-2-58 | Away | Hull Grammar | 12-1 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Hutchinson 4, Leason 1, McGowan 3, O'Kane 3, Robinson 1 |
| 8-2-58 | Home | Beverley | Cancelled bad ground | ||
| 22-2-58 | Home | Riley | 4-5 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 2, O'Kane 1, Robinson 1 |
| 1-3-58 | Away | Marist | Cancelled deep snow | ||
| 15-3-58 | Home | Kingston | 9-0 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Griffin 2, Kent 2, McGowan 2, O'Kane 3 |
| 22-3-58 | Home | Withernsea | 4-2 | Scorers for Malet Lambert | Marsden 2, McGowan 1, O'Kane 1 |
See box below.
15-3-58 Gene absent attending Granny's Rob's funeral. She died 12-3-58.
Common sense and colour scheme obviate the need for table headings. Dates are all Saturdays, opposition colours invigorate Column 3. Malet Lambert colours in Columns 2 and 4, reversed to yellow background for away fixtures and (rare) defeats, are also used to list scorers in Column 6. Nine scorers didn't include the goal-keeper!
Goal Scorers
McGowan was from
Gene's Primary School.
| O'Kane | 12 |
| Robinson | 7 |
| Sykes | 7 |
| Griffin | 6 |
| Marsden | 6 |
| McGowan | 6 |
| Kent | 4 |
| Hutchinson | 2 |
| Leason | 1 |
Gene has no statistics for the previous two seasons, but the results were at least as impressive.
Goals scored per match.
Number
of
goals
scored.
Number
of
matches
scored
in.
| 4 | Griffin twice, Hutchinson once. |
| 3 | O'Kane three times, McGowan once, Sykes once. |
| 2 | Marsden three times, Griffin three times, Kent twice, McGowan twice, O'Kane twice. Sykes twice. |
| 1 | Robinson seven times, O'Kane six times, Sykes four times, Marsden three times, McGowan three times, Kent twice, Griffin once, Hutchinson once, Leason once. |
Brian O'Kane dates his autograph in Gene's book July 26th 1957. That's at the end of the Under 13½ Season.
| O'Kane | 20 |
| Griffin | 15 |
| Sykes | 11 |
| McGowan | 10 |
| Marsden | 9 |
| Robinson | 7 |
| Kent | 6 |
| Hutchinson | 5 |
| Leason | 1 |
The Team Photograph,
taken summer 1958, in monochrome-friendly white shirts, has two goal scorers missing, notably McGowan.
is.... A possibly nearer-by other sports field is the present home of Burntisland Shipyard, an amateur team with an illustrious history. (Burntisland Shipyard 3-Celtic 8 is a 1939 reality!)
Gene's mam didn't play football for , but she did play ship-building for them!
Spot On
Gene hates painting, (as in décor hating!) He hates ladders even more. So, when his mam’s observation regarding the "fresh coat" need of her eaves saw him too many rungs up, cuddling a tin of wobbly gloss, (he was actually supposed to be on holiday), he was not overly chuffed, even though he could risk a lofty over-shoulder peek and observe a football match in progress on a nearby sports field. Gene’s mam was not overly chuffed when said tin fell, (some say was dropped!), and, obeying the law that states that the probability must exceed unity, alighted upside-down on lawn of Mam, forming a perfect disc of thick white.
“Nip over there and see if they want to buy a penalty spot!” as a spontaneous suggestion, seemed both witty and practical, but Mam didn’t see it that way and the eaves job continued to completion, after the clean-up.
A waste of a penalty spot, yes! But real point of this (true) tale is to prove that it’s possible to link football to the launch of a ship said Mam was part of. Reason… Gene didn’t have room to put it on “Naughtycal”! The link
Malet Lambert Under 14½ Football Team 1957-1958
L to R Back. Foster, Scott, Hutchinson, Williams, Sykes,
Mr. Longmate (Manager).
L to R Front. Raynor, Chambers, Kent, O'Kane, Robinson,
Marsden, Griffin.
Price twopence, 2d; not 2p. But this says 2D.
Brian O'Kane's
Autograph
When Mrs R. Beal performed the launching ceremomy at a Scottish shipyard of a new merchant vessel a bouquet was handed to her by Miss Barbara Taylor, one of the women engineers who are now employed at the yard: Miss Taylor has charge of a drilling machine.
Miss Taylor, later Gene's mam-to-be, didn't name the ship, but did give the date:- 31-12-41. Records show it was "Corfoss". This is one of Gene's many links to Burntisland.
The launch has another link to Foot Club.
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